Things they don't teach you in humanities grad school

1. Floss
2. Lawn mowers need to be serviced before winter. Something like: remove and clean (or replace) spark plug. Change air filter. Burn off gas that's in there. And don't use old gas either.
3. When managing projects, don't have meetings every day, or anything resembling every day. Your team gets ornery.
   
4. Get your teeth cleaned by dentist at least twice a year.
5. Make sure you have wipes before undoing diaper.
6. You gotta get some bonds in your portfolio, niggah.
   

Other than that, a humanities PhD prepares you for everything you might ever encounter in life.