The urge to dominate

Had a very nice Zoom call with some friends on Saturday for a high school classmate's birthday. It was a different crew than my regular Chapel Hill cronies, with people of both genders -- with slightly more women than men -- calling in from the Netherlands, San Fran, DC, Austin, Minnesota... as well as the Southern Part of Heaven. It was great to see and catch up with everybody.

Then I hung up and thought about it and realized I had talked an awful lot and that there were people there who barely spoke, and thought perhaps that that was the difference. Had I in fact been a domineering ass? Did I enjoy it for that very reason?

So often when my core crew gathers there is competition for oxygen, with people vying for airspace and trying to wisecrack over each other. We are a lot of guys, with a lot of testosterone, and a lifetime of competing with one another in one context or another. Do I carry that culture of vying for dominance into other social contexts, and thereby become a jerk? I hope not. It was awful nice to see everyone.