I just had a peak at Graham's grades for the first time in months, which marks a lot of progress over last year, when we were unhealthily obsessing over some small challenges he had. Frankly, we got him coaching. He has an executive function coach and also a math tutor. Both are wonderful. It costs us about $700 a month, but honestly I feel like I've never spent money better.
First and foremost, it's because having people who know what they are doing frees me up to not be expressing my own insecurities all over Graham. It was kind of a neat challenge for me when I was helping Graham with his math, relearning the math, sitting with him, trying to convey what I had just relearned. But it was exhausting and I really wasn't good at it. What was good for me was not necessarily good for him.
Even more importantly, Mary and I are not all down in his business all the time in a counterproductive way, being total pains in his ass. It is much like the lessons I've had to learn when teaching him to drive, which has been more or less to chill the fuck out while he is driving and say as little as possible and also indicate as little as possible by my body language. Every time we got in the car it was more me relearning that lesson than him learning to drive.
I am fully aware that our ability to spend this kind of money helping our child is a tremendous privilege that most kids don't have, but what the hell else am I earning money for? I certainly don't need any more possessions. I'm supporting good people in the community. And, up in New Haven, where Natalie is participating in Yale's Education Studies program and does a lot of teaching and tutoring in the community, we are effectively paying it forward as a family unit.
No comments:
Post a Comment